Original: This fellow pecks up wit as pigeons pease,
Modern: This guy picks up clever remarks like pigeons peck up peas,

Original: And utters it again when God doth please:
Modern: And repeats them whenever the opportunity arises:

Original: He is wit’s pedler, and retails his wares
Modern: He’s a traveling salesman of witty comments, and he sells his goods

Original: At wakes and wassails, meetings, markets, fairs;
Modern: At funeral gatherings and parties, meetings, markets, and festivals;

Original: And we that sell by gross, the Lord doth know,
Modern: And those of us who deal in bulk quantities, God knows,

Original: Have not the grace to grace it with such show.
Modern: Don’t have the skill to present it with such flashy style.

Original: This gallant pins the wenches on his sleeve;
Modern: This fine gentleman collects women like badges of honor;

Original: Had he been Adam, he had tempted Eve;
Modern: If he had been Adam, he would have been the one to tempt Eve;

Original: A’ can carve too, and lisp: why, this is he
Modern: He can also carve meat elegantly and speak affectedly: yes, this is the man

Original: That kiss’d his hand away in courtesy;
Modern: Who has kissed his own hand so much in polite gestures it’s practically worn away;

Original: This is the ape of form, monsieur the nice,
Modern: This is the monkey who imitates good manners, this overly-refined gentleman,

Original: That, when he plays at tables, chides the dice
Modern: Who, when he plays backgammon, scolds the dice

Original: In honourable terms: nay, he can sing
Modern: In polite language: and yes, he can sing

Original: A mean most meanly; and in ushering
Modern: A middle harmony part quite adequately; and in escorting people

Original: Mend him who can: the ladies call him sweet;
Modern: No one can do it better: the ladies call him sweet;

Original: The stairs, as he treads on them, kiss his feet:
Modern: The stairs seem to kiss his feet as he walks on them:

Original: This is the flower that smiles on every one,
Modern: This is the charmer who smiles at everyone,

Original: To show his teeth as white as whale’s bone;
Modern: To show off his teeth as white as whalebone;

Original: And consciences, that will not die in debt,
Modern: And people’s sense of fairness, which won’t leave debts unpaid,

Original: Pay him the due of honey-tongued Boyet.
Modern: Must give him credit for being the smooth-talking Boyet.

“Love’s Labour’s Lost” opens with Ferdinand, the King of Navarre, and his three courtiers—Berowne, Longaville, and Dumain—taking a solemn oath to dedicate three years to scholarly pursuits while forswearing the company of women, fasting, and sleeping only three hours per night. Their noble intentions are immediately complicated by the arrival of the Princess of France and her three attending ladies—Rosaline, Maria, and Katharine—who come on a diplomatic mission regarding Aquitaine. Despite their vows, all four men quickly fall in love with the visiting ladies, though they initially attempt to hide their feelings from one another.

The romantic complications intensify when each man tries to secretly woo his chosen lady while believing himself to be the only oath-breaker. Comic relief is provided by a cast of eccentric characters including Don Armado, a bombastic Spanish knight who loves the country wench Jaquenetta; Costard, a simple clown; and the pedantic schoolmaster Holofernes. The ladies, aware of the men’s affections, decide to test their suitors’ sincerity by disguising themselves at a masque, leading to a delightful scene of mistaken identities where each man woos the wrong woman.

The play builds toward what seems like a conventional comic resolution with multiple betrothals, but Shakespeare subverts expectations in the final act. News arrives that the Princess’s father, the King of France, has died, casting a somber shadow over the festivities. The ladies impose a year-long trial on their suitors—the men must prove their love’s constancy through a period of good works and patient waiting. The play concludes unusually for a Shakespearean comedy, with promises of future union rather than immediate marriages, ending with the famous songs of Spring and Winter that celebrate the eternal cycle of seasons and human nature.